Fortune Cappies

Bottles of SoBe drinks often have sayings on the inside of the lid that are meant to be humorous or wise, like a fortune cookie. They also use the lids for contests. Yesterday the lid of my orange-carrot juice concoction (ought to be called high fructose corn syrup with orange and carrot juice) had this witticism inside it:

"Every loss makes you stronger.
Only valid in the USA."

How long has Wolfowitz been moonlighting as a fortune cappie writer?


It Yet Lives

The Book of Vile Dayjobness stirs long after I had thought all life had gone. I had brought four copies of Dungeons & Dayjobs to sell on consignment at a local bookstore. They have a strict six month contract for self-publishers outlining when you can expect payment, and saying that if you don't pick up unsold leftover copies, they will be donated. (I'm not complaining. In fact, some of the other local stores were so casual with their consignment arrangements, I was afraid they'd forget who I was and forget that they might owe me money. It's good business to have a careful agreement.)

My six months runs out next Tuesday on Boxing Day, or the beginning of Kwanzaa, so I stopped in this morning to see if any had sold or if there were any I needed to pick up. They were sold out! I was prepared for the worst, but hadn't really hoped for the best. It's surprising how excited I can get over four lousy copies of the book. I also left three more copies. Maybe this project will have a long tail and eventually break even.

I'm also planning to start a Dungeons & Dayjobs podcast of most of the stories. Maybe that will bring in some interest from different areas. There have been other authors who issued their books in podcast format first or simultaneously while hard copies were available for sale. It doesn't necessarily undercut your sales to issue it in other formats, even free electronic copies like Cory Doctorow has done with some of his books. After a year of being available for sale, how much am I going to damage the possibility of somebody buying it? If anything, this might encourage some listeners to buy a hardcopy. Plus I will hold back some of the stories that are still exclusively in the book, at least for several months or a year. I'll post more about that when it goes live.

Happy Whatever You Want To Celebrate!
...if anything!


USB Flash Drive 1.0 GB "Golden Mars", NEW

If you're in the market for a 1 Gig flash drive that's "N.I.P.", new in two layers of sealed packaging, you might want to check out this one that's listed on eBay right now. The auction ends Dec-24-06 22:15:10 PST. Bidding is currently up to $2.25, although the reserve price is not yet met. Shipping will be $2.95, USPS First Class mail.

In other news, I invented Toasted Marshmallow Apple Marmalade last night. No marshmallows were harmed in the making of this concoction, but I burnt the marmalade ever so slightly, and the blackened sugar gives it a flavor just like marshmallows after you catch them on fire and blow them out. I wasn't sure how that would affect the acidity of it, if it would be acidic enough to protect against bacteria after the canning process, so I just dumped it in jars and stuck them in the fridge for personal consumption. Plus I wasn't sure that family members would appreciate receiving jars of apple marmalade with a few black bits floating inside, even if I reassured them, "It tastes really great, just like toasted marshmallows."


Which Illegals We Should Worry More About

I was reading an article about immigration this morning. In a photo of a protest, someone had a sign that said, "No human being is illegal." I understand their reasoning, but it seems pedantic to fight about the language of bad policies. Anti-immigrant scowlers like Lou Dobbs could start calling them "criminals" and it would be technically true.

Perhaps we could turn around the trend by appropriately calling members of the Bush administration "illegals." A lot of people agree that Bush needs to be brought to justice for illegal acts he has committed. Most of his administration is complicit, some planners more responsible than Bush, even if American prosecutors or courts have not yet brought charges.

I propose we build a security fence around the White House to keep the most dangerous illegals from spreading across the US. They're already in D.C., but at least we can keep them contained there for a while.

Please send a brick to your senator or rep, with a letter attached asking them to inconspicuously place it somewhere around the perimeter the next time they are near the White House. Stopping these major illegals will affect way more lives than any 50,000 desperate immigrants entering the US illegally from Mexico.


Roy Rogers: C to the Owboy

Q: What did famous singing cowboy Roy Rogers say to make his horse behave in that movie where he was trying to make a come-back as a hip-hop artist?

A: Trigga, Please!


Little Red Corsette (banjo prince cover)